A Bit over 16 weeks!

I am about half way thru week 16.. or 4 months! I am feeling pregnant. & unfortunatly I dont have the luxury of having easy pregnancies. Maybe thats why God feels I should only get pregnant every 4 years :) I cant breath.. I have the Rhanitis of Pregnanct. which means I am stuffed up 22 hours a day. I wake up every 2 hours because my mouth is so dry, and I cant breath at all. Drinking all that water makes me have to pee every 2-3 hours. So I havent gotten much sleep in the last couple months. For some strange reason I am able to finally breath around 11am. when I should be getting up to start the day, Instead I sleep for a few hours before rushing off to work. I have cramps all day long, and worse after I pee. They even sent to me to the ER one day and I discovered I had a bladder infection so bad it was nearly a kidney infection. My tummy is getting bigger, and I keep forgetting its there. I havent felt the baby kick yet, but I do feel her fluttering around a bit. That makes me happy, My clothes dont fit. Im tired all the time, and I feel like Im not spending enough time with RIley. Ive fallen behind on my classes, the house is a mess. and I have so many bill I cant pay I dont even open the envelopes anymore.. My 31 birthday is a week from today, and I cant wait not to be 30 anymore, 30 was a HORRIBLE year! The next chapter of my life looks much better.
I have been feeling really sad lately.. very emotional, and hormonal..
I get to find out if I'm right, If Baby Libby is going to be here in April or a baby boy named Brady. Sometimes I think you just know things. in your heart and womens intuition... I have recently discovered mine works very well... :) so I am hoping this one is correct also. It would explain why Im acting like such a girl! Lol,
Riley has been having a tough time listening lately, but I think its just a phase.. well it better be a short one.. Mike is having a really hard time.. He has decided to get off his anxiety medication, which he discovered was the root of our problems.. Why he wasnt himself, and did things he would have never ever considered doing before. So he is stepping down slowly, but there are so many withdawl side effects from it. Im trying to be patient and I pray he will be back to the man I married soon.
I feel like someone stole my happy, and I am trying so hard to find my way back.
The best revenge is Success... and I know that.. so I know I will be my normal cheery self soon, and our dark cloud will pass. Every one has there moments, the periods in their life they would do anything to forget, So.. one day soon, the bad dreams will stop, the crazy thoughts in my head will disappear, and life will once again be sunshine and daisies.
I thank GOD for an amazing kid, who has helped me smile everyday. who reminds me of who I am, and why I am here. A husband, who is doing his best to help me, and fix the problem, who loves me so much, and shows me everyday. I am so thankful to be having a baby. and that this miracle happened after all the craziness. To bring our family closer together, I cant wait to find out if we are having a girl or a boy. Both have so many wonderful things to add to our family.
23 more days :)
So its 2am,... I am going to bed,, well at least for a couple hours anyways,
Tommorrow,.. will be a better day..
I think one of the main reasons I know I am having a girl is because I am so EMOTIONAL!! Its crazy! I have to stop watching depressing shows.. it gets me down.. and makes me think of all they crazy stuff in my life!